My GF and I want to get married soon. Our combined salary is $3,800 after CPF. I'm worried that we cannot afford the wedding or the BTO, as her parents take 1k from her monthly. What should I do? - Seedly
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Anonymous

Asked on 13 Nov 2018

My GF and I want to get married soon. Our combined salary is $3,800 after CPF. I'm worried that we cannot afford the wedding or the BTO, as her parents take 1k from her monthly. What should I do?

Her parents (both retirees with close to no savings) and she $700 per month to live on every month

It is almost an impossible request for me to tell her not to give that huge sum of money to her parents monthly; Her parents mentioned they use this sum to pay for household expenses/credit card bills/insurance/medical consultations etc.. I am in a difficult position to tell her to stop/reduce the amount to be given to her parents and she needs to play her part in our marriage plans financially.

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Firstly, how old are her parents? Do they have CPF balances, or own a fully paid up HDB?

My take is that your gf really needs to sit down and have a conversation with her parents. Yes, it may be tough, cos谈钱伤感情 but i do think its a good time to have a discussion instead of living in unhappiness.

The discussion topics should revolve on the following:

1) How much do both parents require a month? (Go through all the expenses in detail)

2) When is CPF Life starting for them?

3) Are there alternative sources of income their parents can obtain? Such as renting out a room now or in the future?

4) Highlight the fact that you intend to get married, and that you are also intending to BTO. Show them your current flow, and the potential cost involved in your wedding and BTO plans.

Honestly, S$1k a month is seems a little too much for her to bear. With a combined income of S$2,800 after that, it is really a strain on both of you for the upcoming costs that you may have to bear, BTO, Wedding, Ring, Renovation, etc

Like what most of us suggested, perhaps you and your gf can consider taking up a side gig/ part time job to increase your current income!

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It is difficult to reduce allowance given to parents who are not working and have little savings. So maybe lets settle that another way by helping them plan out their monthly expenses and reduce where possible. Are her parents eligible for CHAS to lower medical bills? Are there some recurring expenses like telco bills that can be combined into some family plan that could be cheaper? Could they maybe be overpaying for insurance? Could a regular JB trip help lower costs of household items? These are some things that she can look into and help to apply and lower cost, so it may potentially be easier to lower the allowance. If her parents are comfortable sharing how much CPF payout they are getting each month, that could help in understanding the base "income" her parents have without the allowance.

Wedding-wise I would suggest to have a simple wedding instead of anything large and elaborate.

BTO shouldn't be too hard due to loans and grants. Perhaps get a smaller unit first? And live near one side's parents for extra grants.

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Thank You!
Can you clarify
I wonder if
This is so helpful 👍
What about

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Tiffany SQ

Tiffany SQ

Level 4. Prodigy

Answered on 13 Nov 2018

If $700 to live on every month is little.. 1k for both parents to live on is also v hard for them.. ...

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