Would you be totally transparent financially with your spouse if your spouse and in-laws are spenders?

The question above, my spouse and in-Law are spenders. From my perspective, they do not have much savings/retirement plan. My spouse is the only child. The responsibility in the future eventually heavily lies on me.
I'm a saver and have an above-average income, while I save and invest my money and I have plans and goals to retire early. Being fully transparent w spouse makes me uncomfortable.
This is not right but do try to be in my shoe to understand me.
How would you advise in my situation?

Discussion (9)

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Joe Lee

26 Feb 2020

Adventurer at Game of Life

My SO is a selective spender which also indulge in retail therapy. I have been trying to get her into investment in a bid for her to fund her buying spree for free (Dividend) rather then just outright purchase. Try to find a way that will work for you.

I feel that you have to be upfront about the financial situation and financials goals, if not it will lead to disasters down the road

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Jason Sing

25 Feb 2020

School Of Hard Knocks And Life at School Of Hard Knocks And Life

I would not be totally transparent financially with my spouse. Likewise, my spouse should not be totally transparent financially with me. We should have joint accounts to pay for daily expenses but we should also have separate accounts to pay for our own individual expenses. Hence, for separate accounts, there is no need to be transparent. We should trust each other that we will not overspend on our indulgences.

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Rais M

25 Feb 2020

Accountant at SME

Never hide anything from your spouse. Be open and have a good talk about it. This is the best way for both of you to understand each other in terms of financial planning and can even works towards the same goal.

On a side note, it is still very important that you also have a secret stash should anything do not turn out well. Backup plan.

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Andy Sim

25 Feb 2020

HR Professional at a Financial Institution

Instead of hiding your amount of savings/finances with your spouse, why not try to communicate with him/her your plans for the future and why you want him/her to be part of it. This takes time to change their habit but I believe marriage is a work between 2 people, both of you should work towards a common goal together.

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