facebookI am a full time working mum with 2 young boys ages 5 and below. The first one requires lots of attention as he is very clingy, has low self-esteem and is difficult to handle. Should i quit my job to take care of them? - Seedly
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Anonymous

Asked on 04 Oct 2018

I am a full time working mum with 2 young boys ages 5 and below. The first one requires lots of attention as he is very clingy, has low self-esteem and is difficult to handle. Should i quit my job to take care of them?

The alternative carers of my boys are strong proponents of corporal punishment but I don’t think it helps. In my line, I doubt I will be able to get back into my industry if I were to leave it for 3 years. I have adequate savings for about 3-5 years of expenses. My husband can earn just enough to cover current expenses plus a little savings if we do not travel.

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Answers (4)

Goh Ah Mao

Goh Ah Mao

Level 4. Prodigy

Updated on 07 Jun 2019

A few questions / comments to help you make your decision:

  1. work. How are your current hours like? Any possibility of going part time? What are future prospects like in your company and in your industry. This will help you decide if you should (I) look for a new company or stay and ask for better working hours (II) stop work and go into a different industry

  2. Caregivers. Are you able to change the caregivers to childcare, helpers or another set of relatives who may be more aligned with your discipline style? Are you able to change the minds of these existing caregivers through research, education? Can you find propose activities for the kids to do while being minded so as to cut down on bad behaviour when being looked after? What is your ideal parenting situation? Are you able to see yourself as a SAhM?

  3. Savings / investments. You have 3-5 years of savings. Where are you right now in terms of ability to invest? Are you able to stretch to more than 3-5 years?

  4. husband’s career. What is his career like? Able to increase pay or is already stagnant? Is his temperament suited to be sole breadwinner?

  5. what if? What if you do stay at home? Are you able to cope with cooking, cleaning and looking after the kids? What are your expectations of your husnand when he comes home from work? does he need to help you After he comes home? How much discretionary expenses can you cut away if you do decide to stay at home.

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Leong Wen Fong

Leong Wen Fong

05 Oct 2018

Very thought provoking answer!

Thank You!
Can you clarify
I wonder if
This is so helpful 👍
What about

Post

Lee Jiahui

Lee Jiahui

Level 6. Master

Answered on 04 Oct 2018

There are only a few options

  • childcare, for more social interaction and discipline

  • if already in childcare, change childcare environment to see if behaviour improves, sometimes the environment influences the behaviour

  • maid, but can make matters worse

  • maybe get assessment to see if there are any behavioural/developmental issues.

Quitting your job won't solve the problem, i.e. the problem isn't because you are not taking care of them, it's likely something else

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Thank You!
Can you clarify
I wonder if
This is so helpful 👍
What about

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One of my relative shared with me that her boy were also more clingy when he was 2 years old, it's o...

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