Asked by Anonymous
I work in an MNC, and have always had very good performance reviews. I've been promoted twice, and my CEO tells me that I have a lot of potential in the company. However, I have to travel a lot, and having kids will definitely stop me from doing that. I want to start a family too, but maybe this is not the time? We are both ins our 30s, and also feel that we don't want to only have kids when we are much older. What should I do??
I have a teacher friend who has a similar dilemma as the one you're currently facing. She's much older than I am, and has gone through a few phases of her life while I watched and learnt.
Like you, she waited to have kids and progressed fast up the leadership track in school and now holds a managerial role in a reputable school. Her goals were clear from the start: career-first. But in a recent meetup with her she did coax me not to be as 'silly' as her and always find a balance (guess there's a reason why the term work-life-balance exists). She's probably way past the age of having a kid at this point in her life and she has accepted that fact, but struggles/regrets a little.
Back then, if she had kids, they would have grown up by now while she would have also meandered her way to the top (more stress and hard work and maybe not as high a position as now) but it's all a give and take kind of situation. I guess if you do make a choice to follow your goals (kids or career etc.) then stick with it for the long run. Jia you!
hi there, not sure if this will help but perhaps some questions on the following would help make a decision:
Once you have decided, then i think you can use the tools given by other contributors to talk things through with either 1) your manager (or not - we al know the impact of having such conversations), or look for another company (or not) OR talk things with 2) your hubby or loved ones. I am sure once you decided, you would know how to navigate these communications =)
All the best!
Hi. Suggest talk to CEO to see if they are pro family. If they are supportive I believe you can then discuss with husband if he can help while you travel and if yourself willing to hustle work and kids together. If not then defer later but do note that it is harder and more tiring when one reaches 40 (as my friend now shared ) and even at 30+ will be quite tiring.
All in all I do believe for a good company , they should be supportive and willing to adjust and make comprised and flexible arrangement.
It's good to have it now or it might not be later due to circumstances or body / energy level.
Try talk to each side and get more sense on the group and find support. I believe they all will be supportive and you can have the best of both world. If not , maybe this isn't the right company for you afterall because even if you have it later, they can still be negative towards working mother.
All the best 😀