Asked on 22 Apr 2020
Should I be questioning myself to figure out what dreams I have?
Hello, I hope you're doing well amidst these times both physically and mentally.
I've just started reading 7 habits of highly effective people. One of the analogy they used is to imagine you're attending a funeral, only to realise its your very own. There are 3 speakers who will share about their experiences and how you've lived your life: 1. Your spouse/family member, 2. A close friend, 3. A work associate. Now think about what you want them to describe you; your character, contributions and achievements.
Once you think about those 3 things mentioned, you can start to centre your life around those principles and build goals and dreams to reach them.
With this extended circuit breaker, theres more time to think about long term goals and dreams apart from finances. All the best!
That's a dream in itself. I think the other commenters have raised some excellent points. Something to consider would be: "On your deathbed, if you look back at the life you've lived, would you be happy or have any regrets?"
No, it's not a problem at all. That's part of being human. Sometimes you just have to trust that what you are doing will make sense later on when you look back at it, and continue to do what you have always been doing; sooner or later, you'll (hopefully) have an eureka moment and realise what your dream is.
There's nothing wrong to have a dream of finding a good job and feeding your family at the moment, if anything, it buys you time and money to figure out what you want to do in life, rather than live from pay cheque to pay cheque and worry about where tomorrow's meal is coming from.
I don't think there's a problem with that. I do have friends who are contended with 9-5 work life and their goal is to get married and settle down. This is indeed a dream for them. Living a simple life and able to spend everyday with their family.
I have also came across individuals who are chasing their dreams. When they see their friends settle down and have kids, I often hear them say "I wish my life was simpler. I wish I didn't chase this dream". Of course, it's just a one-time remark. They are still happy with their decision.
I think at the end of the day, it is still up to you to decide what kind of life you want. Never compare because it is vastly different at every stage of life. As long as you are happy and contended, every goal you have can be a dream.
I've always believed the want to pursue greatness comes to any man whether they're small or impossible goals. Definitely no harm to explore for a bit. Who knows you may find a calling right around the corner that'll push you to strive beyond.
Frankly speaking, I was in your shoes and still am in your shoes as of now. :)
But there is a focus point for me recently, which is to fund my upcoming BTO flat ($150,000 to $180,000 loan for both me and my fiance).
Next up, aim to get a decent skillset for yourself (personal growth first) before deciding if you need the extra pay, as higher income comes with very heavy responsibilites at times. But you will never know until you try it. :)
No dreams or aspirations is okay, as long as you are able to survive in Singapore with no outstanding debts and personal liability, especially valid during this harsh COVID-19 / COVID 2020 situation.
Having no-dreams is a dream of its own ;)
A simple life is not wrong, most people are living simple lives, there are more employees than employers out there.
U do have dreams....when u get your dream house. Its not a problem at all about no aspirations...i am a simple man who just the same as u, earning enough for the family. There will be a time, your desire will grow.. and you will have aspiration to strive towards your desire- my personal experience.
No, it is not a problem. It’s good to want to find a good job and earn enough to feed your family and yourself.
Rather than questioning yourself to figure your dreams, maybe you could reframe it and look at what are the things that you enjoy doing and how you want to develop your interests. From there, then you start to get a better sense of yourself and over time your outlook might change.
You don't need a concrete goal in order to start working. Instead, it is good to be self-contented. Continue doing what you need to do. One day, you will reach the point where you realise that you enjoy what you are doing (which is good) or to hate what you are doing.
For the latter, it will be the point when you know exactly what you like and wish to do for the rest of your life.
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